Agent Empathy

As the query letters starting arriving in my in-box following my post Tuesday, a familiar feeling started to come over me. Actually it was a wave of three different feelings and the last time I felt them was a year ago when I previously undertook this challenge. The first feeling was excitement from the fact that people were actually taking me up on my offer to read their query letters while the real agents were off on holiday break. That feeling was quickly replaced by dread, a paralyzing fear from knowing that I had to choose one or two of them to post here as representatives of books I would be interested in reading. And the last and final emotion was relief. I was relieved by the realization that my decision, as enormous as it seemed in my own mind, bore no real impact on the future of each of these writers.

Were I an actual agent, I could not say that last statement. With each rejection I couldn’t help but see myself wetting the tips of my fingers and extinguishing one of many flickering candles that author had lit. In order to survive as an agent I’m sure you can’t worry about that mountainous pile of wax with charred, but cold wicks. Their focus must be on the flames that burn just a little more brightly, turning them into torches with dreams of becoming a full-blown blaze. But just as sure as I am that the literary landscape is littered with cold, unfeeling agents who could care less about the hopes and desires of the rejected, I am just as certain there are agents who live with heaviness in their heart for them. Those are the ones that write personalized rejection letters with advice on how to improve your manuscript. That is the agent I hope to find.

Anyway, all that being said I have my first selection to show you. As I stated in my previous post, I’m not holding this up to you as an example of a good query letter, just a book I personally would be interested in reading, or in this case recommend to my son to read. Enjoy. Oh….and keep those query letters coming!

A monster rages inside seventeen-year-old Ella, yearning for release.

She is the Destructor, a foretold warrior capable of bending air, wind, and fire to her will. And with these elements at her control, Ella must fight and destroy a fallen angel with a god-complex and his army of worshipers before he has a chance to plunge the galaxy into eternal war. Problem is, if she can’t get her power under control, it won’t be the fallen angel the galaxy has to worry about.

It is only the newfound love for a man who cares for her as a father and her hunger for the sexy winged boy straight out of a myth—fairy dust not included—that keeps the monster contained.

That is until one of them dies.

ELEMENTAL is a 67,000 word Darth Vader meets Tinkerbell Young Adult novel.

33 comments

  1. Hahaha! That's awesome. I'm intrigued.

    Good luck sorting through the queries!

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  2. What a great idea! You're generous to do this, Don.

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  3. Good choice. I would read this too!

    Lot of luck to you in your next round of queries!

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  4. "Darth Vader meets Tinkerbell." What a funny line!

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  5. Darth Vader meets Tinkerbell would get that query read for sure if I were an agent.

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  6. Excellent first choice!
    And I couldn't be an agent. I'd feel bad every time I said no.

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  7. Oh, you're a brave man ... but I'll look forward to reading your favorites :-)

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  8. Darth Vadar meets Tinkerbell... *snort* good one.

    As for agent empathy, I KNOW! I can't imagine having 500 emails waiting for me to read. :p <3

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  9. Wow, this is an undertaking. 500emails is a lot to sort through.

    The premise of Elemental sounds fascinating.

    Good choice

    J

    I am hosting a Query Letter Blogfest Dec. 12-18; there are two prized 1)a query critique from a copyeditor-Lynnette Labell- and 2)a visa gift card.

    here's the link:

    http://jodilhenry.blogspot.com/p/query-letter-blogfest-page.html

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  10. Sounds interesting. A little reminiscent of Avatar: The Last Airbender in the opening lines, but I'd probably still pick it up.

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  11. Ooh, I love this! Very nicely out together and great concept! Happy query sorting.

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  12. I would totally buy that book! I'm sold and want to read it...now! :-)

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  13. I love the humor weaved in here and there...I'm definitely intrigued!

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  14. Good choice! I'd read this too.

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  15. It looks like a great one! Darth Vader and Tinkerbell make for a great combo!

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  16. That does sound awesome, and I like that it's not REALLY long and rambly. :D

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  17. Great idea, DL!

    Nice query...I'd be curious enough to want to start reading the ms...

    Best wishes to the writer!

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  18. Great idea! How generous of you, DL :)

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  19. Great query. Love the last line. It really sets the tone for the novel.
    CD

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  20. yay! I would totes read that!! I know who it is too! I can't wait until she gets published so that I can buy it.

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  21. Hello there! Just wanted to stop by and say thanks so much for following my blog!

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  22. Great first choice, Don! Certainly piqued my interest as well!

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  23. You're a brave soul to take that one. But great pick. :)

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  24. You are most kind to take on these queries Don. I like this one. It sounds like a great read! Darth Vader meets Tinkerbell is inspired.

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  25. I love that last line about one of them dying - bravo!

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  26. You're a brave man - let us know how many emails you receive total!

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  27. I would never want to have to be an agent and reject people--that would be so hard. The one you picked certainly sounds intriguing!

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  28. This is really wonderfully written and flows so, so nicely.

    Love the last line! Definitely makes me want to pick it up! :D

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