1. One of the readers usually considered a lock (wife/hubby/significant other, mother, brother, sister, etc.) thinks your book is "alright".
2. After deciding to print out your novel for copy-editing, it takes two of you to lift it.
3. Your cat suddenly abandons the litter box and starts using your manuscript instead.
4. All of your query letter emails are returned with a cease & desist notification for spam abuse.
5. After practicing your elevator pitch on one of your co-workers, they respond with, "I saw that movie last week!"
6. You believe that anything J.K. Rowling can do, you can do better, which explains your Part One of Eight subtitle.
7. You're having difficulty deciding if it should be classified as YA...or Erotica.
8. You considered the term non-fiction a loose guideline.
9. The outline you based your story around looks like Schrödinger's equation.
10. When asked what POV it's written in, your answer is, "What's a POV?"
Did I leave out any others?